“The silicon chip inside her head gets switched to over load…” ~The Boomtown Rats
I swear, this is how I feel today. I try to stay as optimistically positive as I possibly can, but Mondays tend to take their toll regardless. I try to view Mondays as a new beginning; the new start of a new week full of new adventures. But lately, I feel as though Mondays represent all that I have not accomplished. This is especially true after being out of town for a few days. Not only do I have to come home and play catch-up around the house, but then Monday comes along and reminds me of everything else that I have failed to do. For example, the rooms that I never finished painting (yet step over the cans on a regular basis), or the 2 websites that I haven’t finished converting, or the play that isn’t being produced, or the attic that was never cleaned, the garden never pruned, the dogs never bathed, the book never written…Ugh. Mondays.
It’s very hard to get motivated when Mondays are there to mock you.
Today, I find it difficult to want to start or finish any projects at all. I’m exhausted from the amount of events attended in the last 4 weeks, the traveling this weekend, being around a cat (I’m allergic), and now this damp, hot, and humid Carolina weather is just wreaking havoc on my lungs. I know that there is so much that I should and could be getting done, but Monday is here to hold me down. It’s also a reminder that tomorrow I face another nearly 4hr drive–each way–to go to CF clinic in Charleston, SC. It will be a long, lonely day, full of loud driving music, only to face what I am sure will be bad news. My lung function has taken a nose dive as of late, I can feel it. I know that spring time and pollen are a major factor in the decline. This is the first spring in about 4 years that I have not been put temporarily on Prednisone to help the situation (and that is due to the fact that my appointment schedule came up after the peak pollen season). Another factor is that lately, I have been very lazy about my airway clearance therapy. I am a bad patient. What more can I say? I will go to the clinic and be judged by my physician and I will be disappointed and scared by my PFT results. They may even threaten me with being admitted for a “tune-up” which I will adamantly refuse. The doctor will then prescribe me a high dose of antibiotics that I will take for a month and then have to return to be retested to see if there has been any improvement. If so, great. If not, then I get admitted for a few weeks. I’m pretty familiar with this routine. And thank you, Monday, for giving me all of this gloomy weather in which to brood about it.
So, here I am, like most of you, trying to muddle through another start to another week. Painfully aware of my flaws and shortcomings, yet still faithfully optimistic enough to be happy. Who cares if my house isn’t the cleanest? Who cares if I choose to make Hamburger Helper, rather than cook a gourmet meal tonight? Who cares if I just chewed off my nails and polish…again? My book may not be finished, but at least what I have written pleases me. My lungs may not be perfect, but they’re mine and I’m still kicking. We’re here to face whatever comes our way, play the hand that is dealt to us, go wherever the day takes you! Live out the cliches! Haha! Perhaps Monday isn’t here to kick us down, rather it serves as a chance to clear our heads and prepare us for conquering the rest of the week. Make the most of it, folks. After all…we’re all learning to thrive while we survive 😉